But…

Take it all
Have me leaping out of windows 
Heart: no
Soul: no
Being: no
Can’t check all the boxes
I can’t bring myself to actually speak words
You might feel some type of way
But I need confirmation
I can’t be that open
This is already a struggle
Love is too foreign a concept
Not blaming my past
But I can but I can’t
You don’t get how much you make me want to
Change
Open
Give you the code
Let you unlock my everything 
But I’m nervous 
You don’t seem like you want it
And then you do
I don’t know how to feel
I don’t know where to go
I want to turn to you but
Can I?
Can I depend on you?
Or are you just here to carry me through 
I want you permanently
But how can I make it so you want the same
I want you to come to me
Completely on your own
But how much longer?
How much longer should I wait
What’s an acceptable ending to this?
The only way I know how to be is this one
Am I suffocating you?
Can’t you just speak to me
Not surface conversation
Deep and meaningful you to me conversation 
Can’t you just be the one
Because I say I’m falling but
I think I already tripped
I tumbled down into this murky area
And my feelings have become way too much to describe 
If you leave me now I think it will wreck my heart momentarily 
But I can’t make you believe me because I’m a sarcastic liar
I’ve denied everything since day one
I might of just fucked myself over with this one
Can you tell me if we still have a chance
If we ever did
So, basically here is my heart
5•19•15

I want you alone with me
Alone With Me Cher Lloyd

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